FUCK YOU NEVEN

what is white and black and red all over? a half eaten penguin

What's a small person? A midget

What is quite heavy and if it falls off a tree and hits you in your head you die? A sheets packet

What do you call two black men in bed? Twix

Q:What is a black guy running with an iPod in his hand? A: A person who enjoys to listen to music while running.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has been sexually abusing 6 for all his life

Roses are red Violates are blue Go to hell I hate you

A catholic priest held a puppet show at a kindergarten. The children were a very polite audience and the event was considered a great success.

What did the onion say to the the the other other onion Ima cut you fool and make yall cry

Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me!

Why is a blonde a door knob... Because everybody gets a turn

Q: What is the difference between a Ginger and a shoe? A: A shoe has a sole

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to....

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is.." "'Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is' who?"

Knock Knock! Whose there? Adolf Hitler

What do you call a pig with one eye? A pig.

If shoes could talk they'd tell you that they are not willing support your weight & floors are extremely dirty.

What do you call 200 black men jumping from a plane? Night

a potato flew around my room

friends are like potatoes you eat them they die

HAHA SO ONE TIME... The man could not finish his story because he gets shot, and is mourned for years. His daughter was watching it all. She then jumped. And fell. And broke her knee. And then died. yeah

I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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