What is small, black, and loved by children? An oreo.

Q:what do you call a black guy with a gun A:racial equality in our nations armed forces

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

Why did the orange drive the tractor? Because he always wanted to go to the moon.

Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

What's bigger than the Loch Ness Monster? Loch Ness.

whats funnier than drews nose .... ??

Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

How do you save someones life? Do not kill them.

A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

What did the the Priest do to the young alter boy? Blessed Him

What did the Leah say to the Pawneez? AWWWW YEAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why is john unable to ride a bike? because john is a rock

What is the difference between an Irishman and a plank of wood? Almost everything, including anatomy, chemical make up, mass etc

Why did Mary fail to consume her breakfatst? Because Suzy has a history of bi-polar disorder as well as anorexia.

Knock, Knock Who's there? A robber who will most likely kill you along with anyone else who will ruin their chances of becoming more wealthy off your most prized possessions.

What does an Asian man, Black man, & a Hick all have in common with automatic weapons? The Asian is Vietnamese and fought in the Nam, The Black guy lives in the ghetto and was shot in a drive by, and the hick and his best friend got drunk and shot each other in the foot.

What eats dicks for dinner and smells like he just licked an STD infested turtle? Jimmy

What did the baby with Downs syndrome say to the baby with cancer? Nothing, baby's can't talk

I had a "What would jesus do bracelet" and some kid kicked me in the shin... As i was contemplating on what to do to him, i looked at the bracelet and remembered.... SO I SET HIM ON FIRE AND SENT HIM TO HELL!!!

A seal walks into a club.

Get your coat, I've got a knife.

Jared Gough is a slut

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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