What do you call a deer with no eyes? A tragic accident waiting to happen.

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A woman refuses to make a sandwich and walks away unharmed.

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What's pink, wrinkly and hangs out your trousers? Your nan.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interupting cow Interu--- MOOOOOO!!

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Two Japanese men walked out of a bar. They drowned.

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Woman: If you were my husband, I've give you poisoned wine. Winston Churchill: Madame, if you were my wife, I would hope we could have enough love to attempt marriage counseling so as to work out these issues.

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What's better than a gold medal in the special olympics? ICE CREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A terrorist walks into a bar and shoots his virgin

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K

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What's green and has wheels? A chinese race car driver.

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What is a dinosaurs favorite chips? Doritos.

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Why was the boy sad? He had just been in a terrible car accident in which he witnessed his entire family die painful, violent deaths, thus he suffered survivor's guilt. Also he dropped his ice cream.

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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When Life gives you lemons... Squeeze the juice right back into Life's eyes!

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Whats the difference between a van with a bunch of babies in the back and a Cadillac with a bunch of babies in the back I don't have a Cadillac in my garage

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A man walks into a bar, has a drink, pays the bartender, and leaves.

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Jesus was nailed to the cross by Roman guards... His disciples were kept behind a line of guards and they could not hear Jesus speak. They can see he was saying something, so they had to get closer to hear what he was saying. John dodged a guard and ran towards Jesus, but a guard cut his leg off with a sword... Peter ran for it and got past John but another guard cut off one of his legs... Matthew saw this opportunity to dodge both guards and jets past both John and Peter and gets to the foot of the cross... Jesus looks down at Matthew and says, "Matthew.... I can see your house from here!"

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Gabe Mercado

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What do you call a whore? Kelsey cook duh

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Your mom’s so dumb she forgot to update her WordPress installation and now she has pharmaceutical links all over her page.

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Why did the woman cry? She was sodomized by wild animals

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What's better than winning at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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What's white and flies around ? A seagull. What's black and flies around ? A seagull in the darkness.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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