Roses are bright, Violets are sad, I like sprite I'm really struggling for ideas at this point

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she is a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

If you're a man, why don't you want to drop the soap in prison? The shower floors are disgusting and carry bacteria. No way would any person -- man or woman -- want to touch it.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

yo mama's so ugly, it affects her self esteem.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why does Michael J. Fox make a great milkshake? Because he's had a successful career where he has made a substantial amount of money, allowing him to purchase high quality ingredients.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Mmmmmmmmbutch

thumb_up thumb_down +18

An asian loses to you in starcraft..

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Shit happens. Correction: feces happens.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Being a demigod and slaying monsters isn't normal, but on myth it is. MYTH: Not even once.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I just made up a joke! How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Seven. The ending needs some work...

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder of a 7 year old child.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What happens when a man and a woman really love each other?... - They'll most likely go on a date and enjoy themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why was the black man escorted out of the bar. He was 10

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What is worse than something terrible happening to you? That same thing happening to me of course... Duh...

thumb_up thumb_down +14

There once was a man from Nantucket. He said it was a great place to retire.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Communism, Capitalism and an Irish man walk into a bar. Communism says, “I’ll buy the drinks but I require your complete obedient consent.” Capitalism says, “No I’ll buy the drinks but I require that you pay me back with interest” and the Irish man says “No I… I don’t feel very well at all… Oh shite I’ve got the bloody runs!” He then proceeds to shit myself.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why aren't Anti Jokes funny? Cuz they're against my religion.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Whats worse than a bunch of teen-agers throwing kitrens at my house I didn't save them because I thought they were jehovahs witness's

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: What's funnier than a dead baby? A: Two dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why was Bill in jail? He stabbed 17 black people because they didn't deserve welfare checks.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

-When is a door not a door? -Never

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share personal information with a stranger.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A homeless boy walks up to a woman. "I'm hungry" "Then you should eat something."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops