A baby seal walks into a club. And is brutally murdered for a hunting round.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Have you heard the story of the empty room? Theres nothing in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why was the asian so good with computers? Because he spent 8 years in college getting a doctorate in computer programming at the University of Hartford

thumb_up thumb_down +38

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

An elderly lady walks into an elevator. She falls over and I kick her in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What happened to the latino and asian man in math class when they had a test? They both recieved exceptional scores as they both helped each other study the night before.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; Along came a spider, Who sat down beside her But was offered the window seat, Because this was Little Miss Muffet's stop

thumb_up thumb_down +36

why didnt the deaf man laugh? he was also mute

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What do you call a fish that is missing an eye. fsh.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

GOOD AFTERNOON KIND SIR OR MADAM THIS IS THE KUNDALINI EXPRESS MAY I TAKE YOUR ORDER

thumb_up thumb_down +32

what did the cancer patient get for christmas. -an amputation. Luckily, he was cured of cancer due to the amputation, but died 3 days later in a tragic car accident

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How can you tell if a Mexican's gay? Ask politely.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

how did the chicken cross the road. it didnt.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Mean while... at Jerry Sandusky's house

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Knock knock. Who's there? *gun shot*

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Did you hear about the elderly bank robber? Me neither.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's small, yellow and great with numbers? A yellow calculator

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you get when you kill a black man? The death penalty.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you call a Jewish lawyer, who is happily married to a woman, but goes and sees a man on the side? A gay Jewish lawyer who cheats on his fake wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

like my drawing of a white person?

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because once it had inadvertently escaped the farm it was being kept on it was startled and with no concept of road and pavement happened to traverse a road, with no real motive.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

thumb_up thumb_down +26

what did the robot say to the centipede. Stop being a centipede!!!! Its funny because robots have arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops