Your mom is so ugly that she decided to work as a prostitute and she died a virgin.

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What has four legs, its yellow with black spots, and can run as fast as a Cheetah? Another Cheetah

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Why are black people so good at sports? Because there black.

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What's worse than your mother dying in a car crash? Your father dying in the same crash.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

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roses is red violet is blue i will smack you

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What kind of parrot can't mimic human voices? One that's just had it's vocal chords illegally harvested and sold on the black market

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First kid: my name is bob second kid: ok First kid: Now tell me what my name is?? second kid: bob First kid: HOW did you know???

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What's worst than Rick Perry? Two Rick Perrys.

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What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at six o' clock in the morning? He puked a lot, and was diagnosed with a horrible digestive disorder.

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What's cold and icy? Ice

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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What do divorce and a loose bear in a zoo have in common? They both tear families apart

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What do you call a disabled Jew? His name

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Q: What's the similarity between puzzles and women? A: Prior to the 1920's neither had the right to vote.

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What's worse than a School Bus accident? The Holocaust.

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Why can't a T-Rex clap his hands? Because its dead

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Whats white, and edible? white chocolate

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How do you kill a fly? Shoot it

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What do you call someone who is blind and deaf? Dumb.

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A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a soda. The bartender says, "We don't serve soda." The guy then says, "oh", and walks out.

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is mayonnaise an instrument?

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How many Coldplay members can you fit in a car? All of them, the standard car has four seats or more. Coldplay has 4 members so it makes perfect logical sense

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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