what do a snake and a bird have in common? they can both fly! except for the snake.

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2

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Osama Bin Laden dies.

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Why is Justin beaber so white? Because his mother and father both are.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a mosque.

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I once ate at a restaurant where the food was so bad that the chef's name was Earl.

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women's rights

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Why does a ginger have no friends? Because it is a non sentient horizontal stem and thus incapable of forming complex social and emotional bonds with conscious organisms.

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What's worse than a good anti-joke? A bad anti-joke.

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Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waste down and had no way of feeling

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Why can't stars marry? Because they are masses of incandescent gas and thus have no feelings.

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Why don't you have a seat, over there?

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Why did the blonde cross the road? Because she was stupid.

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knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

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Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

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The Economy

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why did the bird fall out of the tree? Earth's Gravitational pull

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Why is your Mom so ugly? She was born that way

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what do you get if you cross a lion with a pig? nothing as the lion would more than likely end up eating the high in fat pig.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on gender and environment, but a fully grown, adult, male polar bear weighs from 800 to 1600 pounds.

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I use to be an adventurer like you! Then I got bored.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money issues and how she wanted a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man: "Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor: "You have aids"

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KNOCK-KNOCK Who's there? There's a man after me, I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me! I'm scared, I don't know what he'll do. Let me in goddamnit! There's a man after me I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me I'm scared I don't know what he'll do let me in goddamnit who?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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