Roses are red, Violets are red, The grass is red, The garden is on fire.

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

What did the handicapped boy say to his mother? Nothing, his severe mental retardation impaired his ability to learn the English language.

Why is the ANTIJOKE symbol 2 mask faces crying? Because some people don't know how to write a good joke.

What is worse worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

you are so ugly you continuously get made fun of for it everyday and already have a savings account for plastic surgery in the near future.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

to the one below me. YEAH RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He removes the piece of lingerie from his face and continues shopping for clothes.

what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

What do you call a bad joke? Unfunny.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing chair ? Gravity.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He had a heart attack

Knock knock Who's there? FBI

yo momma's so fat that when she walked into church she had a nice conversation with some people who encouraged her to start eating better.

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

It is cruel to want a "sky full of lighters" as, according to the Laws of Gravity, the lighters will eventually come back down to earth and incinerate everything below them.

The Aristocrats

Why did the chicken cross the road ? To get to the gay guy's house . Knock knock . Who's there? The chicken.

arse

Q:why was the man on a two seated bycicle by himself? A:his wife had recently died and he wasn't ready to let go

whats funny and has four wheels? A handicapped 11 year old boy getting raped by his father

a drunk man got 3 beers and a 5 whiskys

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender, a known drug smuggler for the Mexican Cartel fires three shotgun rounds. As the bartender reloads Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks first the shotgun out of the man's hands followed by three very quick blows to the head. The bartender goes down unconscious and he is arrested. Though the program is no longer produced, Walker Texas Ranger was a somewhat enjoyable, although poorly written and low budgeted made for television action crime drama series produced from April 21, 1993 to May 19, 2001.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...