A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Q: why did sally fall off the swing A: she had no arms A:knock knock Q:who is there A:not sally

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Whats the definition of helpless? A quadraplegic in a washing machine

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how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

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A penguin walks into a bar and orders a beer................ PENGUINS DON'T WALK OR TALK

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What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

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Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because Bob's a fish.

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So Lindsay Lohan walks into a jewelry store. She buys a $2,500 necklace and goes on her way.

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whats stupid, retarded, and dumb an Erin Perri.

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Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

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Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

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How do you make $10,000 in 1 day? I don't know, but I wish I did.

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14 people jump in a hole about 25 ft deep. they can't climb out because it is a straight vertical drop.

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Did you hear about the woman you got hit by a car? The Driver was intoxicated and had no control over his faculties which cause him to careen off of the road and hit this poor soul as she patiently waited at a crosswalk.

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What do you call a black man who flies planes? A pilot, what do you call him you freaking racist!?!?!?!?!?

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I went to the local RSPCA office today....it's tiny, you couldnt swing a cat in it.

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A man walks into a bar He has a water, he is sober

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Roses are shit Violets are my dick Guess what I do for a living? Sex with refrigerator monkeys!

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What do apples taste like? Apples.

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Why did the Sara fall off the swing, Because she had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there not sara.

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How many black guys does it take to change a lightbulb? None can, since noone can work together because they cant see eachother.

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whats the same about a spider and a grape? they both have eight legs, except for the grape.

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Why did the Russian take a boat ride? Well this isn't possible because we all know that in Soviet Russia, boat ride you.

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Canada

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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