What has nine arms and sucks? An appendage-rich octopus with an inhaling habit.

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School means: Seven Crappy Hours Of Our Lives

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Why did the Jewish man kill his wife? Who cares.

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I met a man today. His name was John.

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wanna hear a really funny joke? sure women's rights.

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why are their no mexicans in hell they all jumped the border

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a big dick, Lets have sex.

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If Pythagoras was racist, he would have made hypotenuses.

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Statutory Rape.

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Q. Why cant Stephen Hawking walk into a bar? A. Because he suffered being paralyzed and is unable to walk. So theoretically speaking it is impossible to walk when paralyzed and in a wheelchair unless the victim is out of his or her wheelchair. Please note that the chances of walking when paralyzed are extremely slim.

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One orphan said to the other, 'what are your parents called'

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Why was the little boy's head so big? He had a tumor in his brain.

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What's the difference between a porsche and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a porsche in my garage.

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A Muslim, a Jew, a Christian, and an Atheist are eating at the same table. They are friends, and they do this from time to time.

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What happened when the terrorist with a bomb went into a school. He blew up and everyone died.

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your moms so fat she has a heart attack when she walks to the pantry.

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wanna hear a joke yo mamma just died

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Your muffins smell good! Oh you is just nasty.

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A three legged dog walks into the bar and says, " I'm lookin' for the man that shot my paw." The bartender replies, "Your father was an honorable man, and I wish I could help."

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Daddy daddy daddy. What. Will you buy me a porn for my birthday. What! I want porn daddy. Shut up gosh your a 8 year old girl

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What is bad about being black and Jewish? Your gonna have to sit in the back of the oven

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Whats worse than one pregnancy scare... two pregnancy scares...whats worse than two pregnancy scares? being forced to having consensual sex with a grizzly bear.

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How do you drown a blonde? From her infancy, instill in her a dread of the water. Keep her away from baths and showers, protect her from pools, and as the child grows, regale her nightly with terrible stories about the cruelty of the sea. When she has matured past 18, take her out to the middle of a lake on a boat and push her in.

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How do you put an elephant in the refrigerator? Open the door and let him in. How do you put a giraffe in the refrigerator? Open the door and let the elephant out then give the giraffe a reasonable amount of time to enter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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