what do you call a child with bruises on his face? Child protective services.

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What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware River? Men, to the boats.

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An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

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EVERYONE, CREATE LOVE NOT WAR.. Between Josh and Dylan... WILD.. PASSIONATE.. LOVE!

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Yo mamma so stupid Her IQ is sub par

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What's sad about a dead person? He was my friend.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes You should probably get yourself checked.

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How did Debbie get a black eye? Because her dad asked her to take off her pants and she refused so he beat her

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Your mother is so classy, when I asked her to order at a fast food drive through she decided to park the car a eat inside.

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A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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I like my coffee how I like my women Without a penis

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In which state does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

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John had 50 candy bars and he ate 45 what does he have...... Diabeaties

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" Not Sally because she has no arms ~Sally jokes

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How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

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Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

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Why did you step on my watermelon?

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally Why can't Sally finish her ice cream She has no arms How do you fit Sally into a box? Put her in a blender. How do you get her out? A straw.

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where was Billy during the bomb? Every where

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2 beavers enter a bar, destroy all the stool legs, and leave.

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whats worse than finding a worm in apple? being chased by retards

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Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

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Why did the cook put rubber bands in the spaghetti Because he was an asshole

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Whats funnier than a guy in a wheelchair? A guy on the floor squirming to get back in his wheelchair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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