Why can't Helen Keller have sex? She is dead

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What do a goat and an eagle have in common? They both can fly, except for the goat.

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69

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What happens when you give someone a free chocolate bar? ThEeyroast it and vapourise it intheir hands....no they eat it

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What's sadder than a dead baby? Any dead adult, considering how much more they've contributed to society.

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If pro is the oppisite of con what is the oppiste of progress Congress

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A jew a muslim and a catholic walk into a doctors office. The doctor is arrested for raping a child and his office closes. The Jew and Muslim find another doctor andthe Catholic dies because he had aids

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My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

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Religion.

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What do you call a gay mexican on welfare? poor

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A blindman walks into a bar... then a chair, then a pole

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Hey girl, are you from Jamaica? Cus ja makin me go temporarily insane.

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What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

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A man and his wife are sitting on the couch in their house, watching tv. The man says, "Do you smell smoke?" The woman then replies, "No." They then proceed to watch more tv.

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Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

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Bob Saget

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What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

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What do you call an Asian man without any clothes on? -naked

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Q: What said the first bagel to the other? A: Nothing! Bagels can't talk!

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How do you teach an old dog a new trick? Answer: You can't

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what do you get when you give an eevee a french stone? Napoleon!!!

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: So it could get hit by a car, to prove that chickens have free will, and have every right to cross a road without any particualar reason.

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 1: Who's there Person 1: me me you who you me you who me you no me (say super dooper quickly)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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