What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the fat guy smell bad? He just farted diarrhea.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?!?! Neither has he

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the white guy say to the two black guys? I like oreos.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why cant helen keller drive Because shes a woman

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call Batman and Robin after they are run over by a steam roller? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +15

a mexican, a asian and a black guy are in a car whos driving? your mom

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the underaged man say when he walked in the bar? He asked for a Coke.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why couldnt Jimmy ride a bike? refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why are black people good at sports? because i f***ed your mom

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Yo mama so stupid she was trying to put her M&M's in alphabetical order

thumb_up thumb_down +13

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down +13

If you watch a pregnancy backwards, it is about a baby that is inserted between the legs of a woman and is slowly broken down for energy and the remains are finally sucked up by a man's genitals. There isn't a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was the Jew evicted from his home? He forgot to pay the rent

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Wheres my hood? Behind your neck.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did Jimmy get off of the park bench? he wanted candy from the man in the white van

thumb_up thumb_down +13

God has lived since the eternal eternity right? And one day he said let there be light? NO WONDER HE IS SUCH A NEEDY GREEDY EVIL FUCK! HOW WOULD YOU FEEL AFTER AEONS ENDLESS IN TOTAL DARKNESS? Moral: It is time for the prince, to stand up as the emperor, then no one shall doubt the power of the moral man.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Please save our environment :) Dont use electricity. Use gas! Like Hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats white and black and red all over? A panda that has just been shot by a poacher.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Tom: Hey Fred. Do you wanna hear a joke? Fred: Sure Tom! (long pause) (10 Minutes Later) Fred: Tom, I thought you were gonna tell me a joke? Tom: I did, the joke is that there is no joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops