- Anti Joke

Q. How do you blindfold a Chinese man? A. With a blindfold.

There are 2 muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says "Damn, it's getting hot in here." The other muffing replies "Holy Shit! A Talking Muffin!"

Roses are red, violets are blue, grass is green, sky is blue, dirt is brown, fire is orange, water is transparent, powder is white

What do you get when you mix Lil Wayne and Lil John? A full size John Wayne

Yo momma is so old that she will be moved to a nursing home next week.

Two homosexuals walk into a bedroom, and begin to have sex.

Knock Knock Who's there Me Me who ME LET ME IN

Are you going to just stand there and watch me burn for i am on fire? Well that is fine because the sensation feels so fantastic. You are going to just stand there and listen to me whine the night away. It is quite okie-dokie for I really love your art of lying! To be certain, I love it very much! I can not find myself telling you what really occurred, I can only explain to you the sensation i felt from this moment. For I have a dagger in my trachea. For the number of days where the do not's fell like the actually do's. I will be very happy :). But where are you trying to walk away from. Than she told me she was leaving. I said no you very certainly are not! Megan Lady-who-sleeps-with-many-men (aka Whore) Fox. We find ourselves back on the day we met...... etc etc, lot's of pissed off Rapper vs. the English language. Than more words fly out of the mouth of the woman that said she "just wanted a hit" than got slapped around the ear by her ex. It is a pointless song. Today's youth is hopeless. (just kidding i love Eminem stay infinite for life)

Why was the old lady sad? Her husband was raped by an angry gallon of milk.

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

69!!! (its funny cause i made a referance to 69)

How do you make a baby float? Two scopes of Ice cream and two scopes of baby.....and the holocaust.

What does a homeless man get for his birthday? 25 cents

Why did spock look in the toilet he was concerned with his poop

Why does a Jew, a catholic, and a buddhist eat pizza? because they like the way it tastes.

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot

Hey its Nero7 (seriously I can go back to Nero now that all other six have been murdered) I can help myself from laughing, not because your "pimp daddy" is crying like a bitch here (I can punch his skull in with a certain arm again if you want), but because I think it was about time you told him how it is.... Okay, and because (sorry babe I dont mean you no harm) "pimp daddy" is so fitting that its funny, but hey, I fucked up by trying to get him to know you again, I might just redeem myself not by breaking no concrete with his skull, but rather by breaking his skull with concrete. Listen, you better stop using your real name (leave that to a crazy fuck like me, nobody believes its even on my birth certificate anyway (crazy ass parents these days huh?) It will all be okay, the other "Nero`s" went down the way they always wanted to, fighting for whats right, fighting for the good of their people... ...Still feel like shit, my head is not clear yet, but I have a backup plan for all my backup plans ;), I was hoping things could always be resolved peacefully, but you might have heard me talk or type about "my shadows" or "The shadows of Nero right?" Lets just say that I more than once met that fuck which walks around the hidden cameras once in a while, and that if he is the leader, he is indeed the leader of a group of spetznas that went rogue... ...Guess its time I told you, these "shadows" are a bunch of spies and assassins I trained after getting trained by a couple of our members that work for a certain... "Federal Bureau Illegal" You are right about me wanting to do the right thing, but if you had believed it was about talking about how to achieve peace and love all the time, I will have to disappoint you... As much as I once hoped that was possible today these guys are trained and proven spies and assassins, and I well, not anymore, too old, but this is worth a shot. A couple days, give or take, and ill be fine, Ill need you to decipher this message (yeah thats why it is unnecessary long sugar bear on for me) Tell my boys that "The Mr.Black needs his shadows" And give them the coordinates, and for fucks sake, do not tell them anything else, or else they will most likely come for their caller instead. If they have any questions they will call you back, its that simple... A lot of good came out of this you know, maybe this dream will soon become my vision for those that seek out the darkness again, because at this point, I bet that at least some people, will at least try respect The Last Nero again... (Let us never use that name again) Hey, ill make sure I have a backup after this backup, and I will "call you here" yeah those numbers after the phone number embedded in this message, is the day and time (AM) ill contact you again, and if things dont work out... Ill finally get to use my lighter, and lit this stick of cigar I have been keeping around for years, and have one last smoke in a boom of glory. Hey, speaking of bull, I lied to you back then, I am not 45 or whatever I said, I am 35, I just did not want you to think you where being raised by a kid back then, and in case you wonder why I never brought you back to your mom, its because I spoke with her and she was never really against the idea of your dad making a bit of coke money as long as he shared... Need to lie down for a bit, lost my contacts, so I am back to using these dorky glasses, when my Shadows call you back, please tell them to send Mr.Black some contact lenses, or a couple of field glasses, ill need them. Love ya girl, please call my wife and tell her that I love her, and that ill do my best to make it back... Sigh, for dinner or something... Just let her know again if you never hear from us again eh? Ps: If you want me to kill your father (he has lived a good life, and I made sure he lived one too good for an asshole) then send me the secret code "yes kill my "pimp" daddy. Please reply, and then its time you go to bed... Says the guy that just admitted he is four years older than you... Sorry for that...

I got pissed off at my little brother... So I threw him out of the window.

What would you get if you crosses a potato and a frog? Nothing because potatoes cannot breed with animals

Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

field day?

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm colorblind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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