Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

What would happen if an asian guy and a black guy had a baby? Nothing. It is impossible for a baby to be born since men produce sperm cells not egg cells and for a fetus to form, you need an egg and a sperm, so you would need a male and a female so since they are both men it is physically impossible for them to produce a child.

Turnabout: American study of the Japanese Stereotype man: Murican: Excuse me Mr Japanese. Jap: The answer is within the heart of battle.. Murican: Yes but I just want to ask you some few questions. Jap: You are disturbing my feng shui I must power of the mystical fireball of surge fist energy get... *uppercuts waterfall BECAUSE REASONS!* Murican: What? But this is a serious study! Jap: Sowwy I do nothe speeky the shamefull language of the engrish! Murican: But you just said... Sigh... Conclusion: Carpet bombing of Japan funding increased. "slap a Jap" commercial project from world war two reinstated for the safety of the American people. Experiment two: The study of a American man raised in Japan. Murican: Hello I wonder if... American raised in japan: GADOUKEN GADOUKEN GADOUKEN! ORA ORA! Murican: Dead/KO. American/Japan: FRAWRESS VICTOLY! Result: World war 3 GET!

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black And so was six because they were written with black pen

What do you call Helena… A Shady palm tree

What do you call a black pope? Catholic.

What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

Q: Why did Susan fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Q: Why did no one help her up? A: She had no friends Q: why was she at the play ground? A: Her parents were fighting again Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susan

Roses are red, Violoets are blue, I accidentally shat my pants. Brb

knock knock whose there open the door open the door who just open the door so i can come inside

How do you kill a baby? You take a gun and shoot it.

Where is aodhan's ma? Jail, she was cought with a bag full of the white powder.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

Why are lizards broke? Because they run around the desert with no money...

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, Dandelions are red, I lit your garden on fire.

Mahjdichdhsjxidjhsbxu shcowiqx own hdqu Hedgehog the third

Q: what did the emo girl use to check her email? A: A computer.

What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident.

Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

Why was the woman happy to give birth to a beautiful, healthy child? Just kidding, she had an abortion.

Me John Kasich! Me win Ohio primary!

roses are red violets are blue your moms a whore thats it

Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are white And Pansies hold hands and skip

A black and a mexican jump off a building, What a tragedy...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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