Q. What does the pencil and the basketball have in common? A. They both are made from wood, except for the basketball.

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Roses are red. They also have thorns. Their family is Rosaceae and they are often given as gifts between lovers. They grow in well drained and fertile soils...

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: It didn't, instead it got put in to a McDonald's chicken wrap. Life is funny sometimes, and sceane

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Yo momma so fat, she has large amount of fat deposited in her body

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Once upon a time there was a boy who got ran over by a truck. No one cared.

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Guy: Hey, you want to dance with me? Girl: Who me? Guy: Nooo that bench over there...

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jesus can walk on water but chuck norris can swim through land

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What do you call a Mexican with a lawnmower? The guy I'm thinking of is named Pedro. He works hard and takes care of his family.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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A black guy and his black girlfriend are in a car. Who's driving? Their driver. The black guy has a very prosperous career and their life is at the envy of many.

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What do you call a person with a cane? someone with a walking disability

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what do you call a black man in the dark? missing.

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A chicken walks into asda/walmart The person at the counter says: "What can I get you?" The chicken says: "Cluck"

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Daym im romantic

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Hey, you wanna hear a joke? The holocaust.

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A student exclaimed "This test is a piece of cake!" He ate it.

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knock knock whose there? suck my a s s barf

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What did the monkey say after its tail was run over by a lawnmower? It won't be long now.

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Why is chad so gay? Its his choice.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Solely for our entertainment purposes.

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Violets are blue, Roses are red, I like to mix up my poems.

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Illumati Confirmed

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? .....Neither have they.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops