knock knock... whose there? I don't know why don't you open it and find out dumb ass... Gosh people and their common sense these days!!

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Why did Jimmy cross the road? Because a chicken was about to cross the road, and he wanted to be kind and help the old 72-aged chicken get across the road. Because Jimmy had a grandfather that passed away because he was too old and nobody helped him cross the road. Jimmy is haunted by that memory and doesn't want that to happen to anyone else. Especially a chicken.... Also there were no cars and his best friend chicken was on the other side waiting for him.

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Bad grammers.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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How was a blonde woman able to get into Harvard? She was smart and had a very good SAT score.

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Why did the 14 year old girl have sex? Because she's in love with her boyfriend and that's how she expresses it.

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John and Henk are walking down the street. John kills a man, the cops are coming and John runs away. Why didn't Henk ran away? Henk was a rock

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What do you call a Muslim guy on a plane? A passenger.

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What is the difference between a blond and a red-head? They have different hair colors.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Realising the apple is the worm...

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kesha is a virgin.

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Whats the difference between a truck full of dead babies and a truck full of bowling balls? You can't pick up the bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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Some people like melon and others like soup.

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Whats red and dirty? Her period

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Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick basterd !

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how many toyota's does it take to pee on a soccer game 900 because isis is a cat vagina

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What did the boy to it's grandad........ UR COuSIN¬

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whats fat round and bouncing off the ground= George goodburn

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What did Helen Keller's parents do when they were displeased with her behavior? They beat the shit out of her.

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What's funnier than the pope in a speedo? Humor is subjective, so answers vary from person to person.

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Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car, Robin.

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How did the girl get her Mardi Gras beads? She purchased them at a reasonable price from a party store.

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Yeah, me too. The car just ran straight through the stoplight and it was all over...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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