What do you say to a black guy who is holding a gun to your head? Nothing. He is holding a gun to your head.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Someone clearly messed up on naming the flower. Violet is synonymous with purple, Which is obviously NOT blue; It's the mixture between blue and red.

Man 1: What's the difference between an elephant and a mailbox? Man 2: I don't know. Man 1: You'd make a terrible postman

What do a turtle and a tree have in common? They both can fly except for the turtle............and the tree

What did the phone say to the man? Ring ring.

Roses are red Grass is greener I think of you when I play with my weiner

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

nena. nerna. neener. neezie. nena.

Why was 6 afraid of 8 because 8 kidnap 7

why dose micheal jackson like 29 year olds Because there is 20 of them

Nickleback walks into a bar..... There isn't a punchline because ruining music isn't funny.

What happened when a star exploded? It killed billions of other sentient beings.

Knock knock Who's there? *silence* WHO'S THERE? *silence* -Looks out window- Slenderman

What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

I was very thirsty so I decided to go get some soda.Upon reaching the soda store I discovered a very long line. I decided to leave the line and instead get some milk, unfortunately once again there was a long line at the milk store. Discouraged by still thirsty I decided to try to luck at the punch store. There was a long line there also.

Where did the Jew put his money? In a low rist, interest bearing mutual fund.

what is the best way to stand out from the croud? open up your butt hole and take a video for to put on dat jumbotron

A man starts acting weird in a resturant, the waiter says "whats the problem sir?" The man says "I'm choking and I just died."

John Travolta goes to the supermarket..

How do you fit four elephants in a car ? Two in the front and two in the back

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

Whats the different betweene a drugdealer and a cop? I dont know but i think they dont have the same wife.

How are cars made? By magic.

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a psychopath

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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