Why do girls wear perfume? Because they smell and they're ugly

How many morman minutes does it take to get to school? A lightyear

So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

Why was't the Elephant allowed on the Airplane? He didn't have a boarding pass

How many Jews fit in an oven? Nein

How to you get a clown off a swing? You shoot it in the face.

Why did the penguin die? due to an increase in the quantity of greenhouse gases that are being released into the atmosphere, global warming is on the rise. So the penguin died because his home melted.

What do you get when you cross a parrot and a beach ball? A beach ball with a parrot design on it.

What number is funnier than 23? 24.

why am i sore i bummed a giraffe

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven.

Why did Sarah limp to school? Because she got hit by a tree

What do you call an old man who took too much viagra? And ambulance, because he could possibly get a heart attack from the fluctuations in blood pressure

Why are their so many lesbians? cause they LOVE the pussy.. (Tastes soo wet and tight)

Where do 4 Mexicans in a car go? In the Car Pool lane.

What do you get when you cross a muslim and a mexican? i don't know, i just thought that this would make an interesting question.

Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

How do you call a man in a wheelchair? Disabled.

If a tree falls in a neigheorohood lots of people hear it.

What's similar between my butthole and shampoo? They both smell good, except for by butthole.

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her repeatedly in the chest with a ball point pen

its all aodhan

i am iron man running over fat kids in my van

What did the white man say to the black man that was very interested in the story he had to tell? Cool Story bro, tell it again!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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