Q:What did the man say when he walked into a bar. A: Ouch

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Ok, for Christ’s sake, these sh!tty “animals falling out of a tree” jokes are NOT funny; they were never funny and they’re certainly not getting any funnier with you rehashing them every 5 posts. Fncking stop it.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Me: f*** off Asshole: YOUR MOM! Me: -is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Why did the cat throw up on the couch? because it was nauseous!

thumb_up thumb_down -54

A black teenager drives an Escalade His father is a prominent lawyer and his mother is a neuroscientist.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Do you play piano? No

thumb_up thumb_down -54

theres a fork in a drawer half way open and a knife in a cup on the counter. how does the knife get into the drawer, it cant knife are incapable of moving

thumb_up thumb_down -56

How did the mexican cross the border? He went through border patroll, and then later became a legal citizen of North America

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Why did the chicken cross the road? WHO CARES!!

thumb_up thumb_down -66

planned on writing you all an antijoke decided i wouldn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

What did the person do at the stop sign? Stop

thumb_up thumb_down +57

why'd the baby cross the road it was stapled to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +53

What rhymes with popscicle and weighs at least 300 pounds? Your mom. I lied about the popsicle.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Dave: My wife just gave birth! The baby is doing good. John: You mean doing well?

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why didn't the boy have any toes? - Because he did not have any legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

My children are huge mistakes.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What is better than a cat? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Yo mama is so fat that she has to buy plus size clothes because small size clothes would be inappropriate for her to wear.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What is a person who can hold there breath for an hour? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +49

So two clowns walk into a bar... . . . . . . . . . . They died

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What did the mute person say to the deaf person? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Why did the dude fall? Because he tripped over a stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

In that case you are probably a bit of an outcast as most girls of your beauty are, you know, you are that kind of girl that feels weird because when she got/gets on the buss EVERYONE stares at her, but nobody dares to say anything, right? And when you are hanging out for a drink or something guys stare at you, and go like "nah" which means "Nah she is too good to want me" and starts hitting on your friends instead. Oh and you also get a lot of rude comments from guys "auto disqualifying themselves" like using complements they know will backfire like "Hey wanna fuck sugart1ts? They do this so they can go home with their ego intact thinking "Hey I was tough enough to hit on her, but she turned out to be a bitch! So does any of this sound familiar?

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Toys -Lets Go MEts

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops