What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

what did the ninja say to the watermelon nothing that was chuck norris's watermelon

What does a black man, an Irishman, and a Jewish man all have in common? Male genitalia.

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

Wanna here a funny joke? Doug.

LIE

A dyslexic man walks into a bra

What did the moon say to the sun? "I am the moon."

When life gives you Corn Nuts, snack on them while watching your favorite TV show. Then go to sleep early and have a nice, peaceful rest, dreaming about the fun things you'll do tomorrow.

Whats worse than breaking your toe? Being raped

How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagon? 5 comfortably

Knock knock. I HAVE A SHOTGUN

A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Ah, come in!

Why didn't the blonde have friends? She couldn't find them at the store.

A blond, a brunette and a redhead jump off a cliff. Which one hits the ground last? Depends on their weight and drag co-efficient.

ok so what is big yellow and can not swim well dont look for the answer deuce bag

A man decides to commit suicide and jumps from the highest building in New York, he dies instantly on impact... the day was septermber 11th 2001, either way it was the end for the man

What's the difference between a joke and an anti-joke? - I dont know man, but you're adopted.

what happened to the woman who was a prostitute? She was arrested because it is a crime

What person looks most like Jim Carry? Jim Carry

What's the difference between Skittles and black people? ...I like Skittles.

Yo momma is so fat... Her body mass is above average.

Whats better than 1 dollar? 2 dollars.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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