What's an Animal? A natural periodic state of rest for the mind and body, in which the eyes usually close and consciousness is completely or partially lost, so that there is a decrease in bodily movement and responsiveness to external stimuli. During sleep the brain in humans and other mammals undergoes a characteristic cycle of brain-wave activity that includes intervals of dreaming. ... are you retarded? yes how did you know?

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What do the Japanese hate more than sitting in traffic? tsunamis.

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Why did the Chinese man cross the road? To get to the Chinese restaurant.

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Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

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what do you call a dead baby in a blender? -taken care of. by: Calee^_^•

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What is the worst part about being a black Jew? Having to sit at the back of the gas chamber.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gang-rape.

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Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Evolutionarily destined to be eaten by a predator such as a wolf or coyote, barring haing a defense mechanism that allows it to fend off such attacks.

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How do you treat a homeless man? Like any other person, you disgusting fuck.

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Whats better than 1 dollar? 2 dollars.

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How do you make a clown sad? Throw a brick at him.

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Three men stood before Saint Peter at the pearly white gates. They were then sent straight to Hell for committing mass suicide in hopes of reaching a higher state of being through a device located on a meteor.

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Knock knock. I HAVE A SHOTGUN

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Why was the little girl screaming? She was on fire. ~G TY

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"An alcohol walks into a man. He is a family and is destroying the bar." Says the drunk man to the bartender who wrote it on Anti-joke.com.

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"Lack of sleep" is that like... Sleep deprivation?

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Wanna here a funny joke? Doug.

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Don't look! I'm naked! No, seriously! I'm naked!

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Why couldn't the 10-year-old go to the moon? Because it's the Moo-oo-ooo... no you can't come!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Two computers walk into a bar I forget the rest

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What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

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what's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? the holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? three bee stings.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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