Q: Why didn't the Government help the poor little boy? A: Because he was taking a test and that would be cheating.

Why did the woman fall over? Because she had both of her arms amputated so when she lost her balance she had nothing to counter her weight going forward with an inverse motion.

I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis.

A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. You are under arrest for sodomy.

What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

Guess what? what. You guessed it!!

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

What happened to the chicken crossing the road? She found a male chicken, had many babies and lived happily forever after.

Yo mama is so stupid, she has a sub-par intelligence quota.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

What do you call an arab with a shemagh on his head and a gun A man who is concerned for his wellbeing and family

Once there was a man, he was accused of false accusations.

Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

Why are so many children obese? Because they eat to much and they are not physically active enough

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

knock knock whose there?? seth oh, come in

An englishman, irish-man and a scotsman walk into a bar. Englishman orderds a pint of becks, Irishman a guiness and the Scot a whiskey. Everything is absolutely fine and nothing of even remote interest happens.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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