What do you call two black men in bed? Twix

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree He had no limbs

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

Roses are red Violets are red The trees are red Oh crap, the garden's on fire.

Where can find a man who owns a white van capable of transporting many children? Most local churches have them for mission work. I would contact a local minister.

Honestly though bud, are you wasted? XD

A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

What caused the Berlin Wall to come down? Gravity

What is brown and gurgles? dead baby casserole

How come little billy couldn't ride a tricycle? Because he was born without legs due to a rare disease and therefore can't pedal.

What is the difference between a girl and a boy? Well, a girl has two x-chromosones but a boy has and X and a Y chromosone.

wanna here a dirty joke? Suree A white horse fell in a mud puddle dum dumdum dum duuuuuuummmm

The shopkeeper said to a customer, "It's raining cats and dogs!" The customer said, "Okay, I'll take eight of them."

Ask me if I am a tree. Are you a tree? No.

where are the maternaty clothing in walmart???? The C section

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had Gonorrhea.

why did the little girl fall out of the tree? She didnt have any arms

Why isn't pluto a planet anymore? Nasa decided it was too small

whats worse than getting the girl you're talking to taken from you? getting the girl you like taken from you.. by a asian.

It's April Fool's Day and a little boy runs up to his mom. "Daddy hung himself! He's in the attic!" The mom runs up to the attic, but the dad's not there. The boy looks at his mom and says, "April fools! He's in the basement!"

What's worse than seeing your goldfish die? Watching your grandfather have a stroke.

when i go to a nude beach people think im looking for lost jewelery and treasure

Your mother is so fat that she once ate an entire peach cobbler in one sitting and chastised herself yet again for her lack of self-control over her eating habits and her need to fill the holes in her self esteem with the short-lived gratification she gains from eating too much of the foods she finds tasty.

knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...