Why did the cow jump over the moon? He cant jump over the moon due to low gravity

Q: What do you call a guy that likes men? A: Gay.

What do you call an Indian cook, that cooks in a Chinese restaurant? A chef

It’s dead.

Yo mama is so stupid, she has a sub-par intelligence quota.

Knock knock Who's There? (It was a ding dong ditch. Or a knock knock ditch. What ever.)

Roses are red Violets are blue My dad drinks a lot Help Me

Paige

Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

Whats the difference between a ham sandwich and a dead baby sandwich? I don't stomp on my ham sadnwiches with cleats before I eat them.

It was a stormy night and a stinking boy was running away from the co-op, he was clutching onto his pocket and constantly looked over his shoulder.... panting the boy reaches for a rusty door handle he opens the door quickly and shuts it behind him. "mam i got tea" said the boy "thanks david we will eat tonight for once" said a big chinned pharaoh.

What did Batman say to his parents? Nothing. They're dead. Idiot.

Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? There is no Santa Claus.

whats red and can fall on you blood from a hunted duck.

Two sausages were in a pan. One says "Wow it's hot in here!" the other says "OH MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE"

What Happends When Sawdust Gets in your mouth You poop logs

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

A horse walks into a bar, it gets a concussion. -mattobrado

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

69

what do you call a man in a hole Fill

How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

How many friends did Jeffery have? 0 because he ate them and put them in his fridge.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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