Teacher: Billy what do you want to be when you grow up? Billy: A fireman! Teacher: Tommy what do you want to be when you grow up? Tommy: 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man walks in a barn. He lifts his bucket of food and starts feeding his horses.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the man bring the computer to the doctor because it had a virus

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your dog and finding a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a black guy driving a Mercedes through New York? A U.S. Citizen

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A pig and an elephant walk into a bar. But the pig doesn't even make it into the bar because the mentaly insane elephant ate him. Ouch

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the man say to the other man? You smell nice today.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Where does Osama bin Laden do his shopping? He doesn't, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: What's the biggest difference between a black man and a white man? A: Their skin color.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Whats worse then losing your phone? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Yo mama's so fat that when she stepped on a scale, she saw her ex-boyfrien's phone number!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What is the difference between Boyscouts and Jews? Boyscouts come home from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a hard working black man? A hard working black man.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

fuzzy wuzzy was a bear fuzzy wuzzy had no hair so fuzzy wuzzy wasn't fuzzy was he? yes

thumb_up thumb_down +20

irish wristwatch JLR

thumb_up thumb_down +20

im a dragon, no im not

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Communism, Capitalism and an Irish man walk into a bar. Communism says, “I’ll buy the drinks but I require your complete obedient consent.” Capitalism says, “No I’ll buy the drinks but I require that you pay me back with interest” and the Irish man says “No I… I don’t feel very well at all… Oh shite I’ve got the bloody runs!” He then proceeds to shit myself.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

when i go to a nude beach people think im looking for lost jewelery and treasure

thumb_up thumb_down +20

The nurse at a hospital came out of the delivery room and chucked the baby down the hall to the father. The dad starts crying and the nurse starts laughing and said, "It's ok, it was already dead."

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Whats worse then Justin Bieber? It's a trick question, there's is nothing worse than her

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was mad at it wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

a blonde, a brunette and a red head are robbing a bank, they hear the police coming, so they try to find a place to hide. The red head hides in cat cage, the brunette hides in dog cage and the blonde hides in potatoe sack. When the police come the brunetter says "Woof, Woof!" the red head says "MEOW! MEOW!" and the blonde says "P-O-T-A-T-O-E!"

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the penguin die? due to an increase in the quantity of greenhouse gases that are being released into the atmosphere, global warming is on the rise. So the penguin died because his home melted.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops