What do you call a man with a towel on his head? A good target.

Q. How did the blind man survive from walking of a cliff? A. He didn't he died

poop is very very yummy.

Nyan cat had pancakes for breakfast.

who's best is friend is really good looking? James Cornish

Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

Q: Who lives in a pinaple under the sea? A: Garry

What's the difference between a turtle and a fish? Turtles aren't fish.

^that joke a piece of shit

Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. It is ignorant and offensive to judge the world of cardinal numbers, where protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary, by the standards of human societies.

Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son was captured by a sexual predator, and your daughter tried to run from them, and now she's under the wheels of the bus going round and round.

Roses are Red Violets are dog I'm Senile Flower tastes like frog.

A blonde walks into a store and tells the clerk "I'd like to buy that microwave". The clerk says "we don't sell things to blondes.". The blonde comes in the shop the next day with a brown wig on and says "I'd like to buy that microwave". The clerk says "we don't sell things to blondes". The blonde asks how he knew she was a blonde. The clerk replies, "I can see flyaway strands of your hair from the top of your wig and the synthetic hair material of the wig is not convincing.

crap!!

Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

What's worse than losing something? Dieing.

Deadly cancer.

What is matt dalys favorite thing in the world? penis

why didnt the chicken cross the road? It was getting tired of the jokes

Why did the chicken cross the road? because he was hungry and mcdonalds was across the street

What's funny? At the exact moment you read this, someone is suffering from domestic abuse.

What's small and red that sits in a corner? A baby with a razor blade.

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Your family is dead. Your family is dead, who? Your family is dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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