What do you call girls that can run faster than me? Virgins

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What is white, sticky and tastes great? Milk

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knock knock, whos there? your neighbor's cat..no not really, but your sister just got raped

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Whats big brown and sticky A sappy oak tree

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What do you call a man with a towel on his head? A good target.

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Q. How did the blind man survive from walking of a cliff? A. He didn't he died

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A priest, a midget, and the toothfairy walk into a bar. Barack Obama.

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crap!!

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A blonde walks into a store and tells the clerk "I'd like to buy that microwave". The clerk says "we don't sell things to blondes.". The blonde comes in the shop the next day with a brown wig on and says "I'd like to buy that microwave". The clerk says "we don't sell things to blondes". The blonde asks how he knew she was a blonde. The clerk replies, "I can see flyaway strands of your hair from the top of your wig and the synthetic hair material of the wig is not convincing.

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Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son was captured by a sexual predator, and your daughter tried to run from them, and now she's under the wheels of the bus going round and round.

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Roses are Red Violets are dog I'm Senile Flower tastes like frog.

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Nyan cat had pancakes for breakfast.

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poop is very very yummy.

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What's the difference between a turtle and a fish? Turtles aren't fish.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. It is ignorant and offensive to judge the world of cardinal numbers, where protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary, by the standards of human societies.

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^that joke a piece of shit

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who's best is friend is really good looking? James Cornish

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Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

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Q: Who lives in a pinaple under the sea? A: Garry

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knock, knock come in

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What is the square-root of pi? ?pi

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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A drunk man is that last one inside a very popular bar. He passed out on the counter before he ordered a drink. The bartender is angry at a sale lost, which would have been his millionth sale before closing time on the 1000th day of business. He goes home and hangs himself.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Your family is dead. Your family is dead, who? Your family is dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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