A white guy, a black guy, an Indian guy, and a Jewish guy walk into a bar. They drink in moderation and discuss their children, the current state of the economy, and global politics before retiring home to their families.

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

Your mother is so fat. But I'm fine with it.

is this the krusty crab? no this is child services were taking your children.

what did the boy with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for easter AIDS

Q:What did grandma get for christmas? A:a coffen

Whats big brown and sticky A sappy oak tree

Is this the krusty krab? No, this is Patrick

What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

What is grey and looks like a rock? A rock

What's funny? At the exact moment you read this, someone is suffering from domestic abuse.

what is the awesomest of them all? me

what do a parrot and a hippo have in common? i want to kill every non white human being!!!!

I had a dream, then i died in it and now i'm dead but who cares, how are you ?

Two gorillas swing into a bar and are promptly escorted out because the gorillas are alcoholics.

What happened when a 16 year old guy went over to his friends party? found out he wasn't friends with anyone there, got kicked out and committed suicide.

There was this women at a banana festival, but she didn't like bananas. So she split

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a cucumber

How did the magician make it look like there are 2 books on the table? By putting 2 books on the table

Why did Sarah fall of the swing ? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Well it cant be sarah

what rhymes with pirates? not Somalia because i don't consider a inflatable boat a pirate ship.

Me: Ask me if im a penguin friend: are you a penguin? me: no.

what did the black man eat for dinner? a sandwich

Q. What do you get when a banana and a person mate? A. The banana suffocates

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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