why did chuck norris walk on water? because he's chuck norris

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Did the boy ever tell you how he died? Trick questions he's dead, deceased bodies can't talk.

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Why did the boy lose his watch? Who cares? It was a shitty-ass watch.

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What do you call a guy who makes jokes about a girl being in the kitchen? Single.

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Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

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How many pairings of animals did Moses collect before the rain started? 1. 500 2. 50000 3. 500000000 4. Nobody really knows 5. It was Noah... Moral: Lol.

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a dog walks into a drug store and orders a bone. what does the cashier do? she wakes up.

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What do you call a dragon with no wings? A komodo dragon

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Yo mommas so fat... that when it was rainning, she put on her rain coat and went outside, everyone was saying that the sun came up

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A white guy, a black guy, an Indian guy, and a Jewish guy walk into a bar. They drink in moderation and discuss their children, the current state of the economy, and global politics before retiring home to their families.

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Good question, probably because I cannot get enough focus to "put a spell" on anyone because of my allergy, I use "autocast" for the rest. "Put a spell" I have not heard that since I was 14, that's really oldschool, and kinda geeky, back then it was code talk... Which is also geeky unless it actually serves a good purpose. AAAND... I served my mandatory time in the army as a minesweeper, we got attacked by fucking allies because of a... Yeah, I killed, people on our same team, still bad people, they offed about everybody else until I showed up, long story short, yeah I offed four of them, but that's like ten years ago.. My turn, you really got a crush on me dont you?

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how do you scare a mexican? You dress up as a bar of soap.

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Roses are red Violets are blue your mum is fat and so are you

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How did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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why was the boy's face burnt? a horrible accident involving a lighter and some hairspray

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vbh

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How does a muslim make his parents proud? He gets good grades.

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Two buissness men had a meeting at 12:00 they had there meeting at 12:00 and left back to there normal life.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well neither has he.

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What's worse than finding a fly in your coffee? The holocaust. What's worse than that? Two flies in your coffee.

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sticks and stones may break my bones but hemophilia will make me bleed to death

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A 36 year old Canadian woman.

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Why did the burglar get arrested? For beating an egg

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You heard about that piece of shit that says no all the time? Yes, I bet you haven't though. no.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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