Q: Do you know what really makes me smile? A: Facial Muscles.

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What do you call a flying jew? Smoke.

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What did the dad do immediately do after his child died? Cleaned off the knife.

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Why was Soren gay? Because he likes to eat men's Penises!

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Why did LeBron James up and bail on Cleveland? He thought there was a greater opportunity for postseason success by playing in Miami.

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What is white and is sometimes drunk? Milk.

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So a man walks into a bar and wonders why he walked into the building instead of simply just walking through the door. The man then realized that the building was if fact not a local bar, but instead a bowling alley. He was hallucinogenic and was in serious danger as he approached the candy man in the alley.

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What do you call a black man yelling into a crowd? a preacher

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so there are 3 people who have heard of this magical cliff; theyre names are harry, dick, and joe. how the cliff works is that when you jump off you turn into whatever you say as you jump. first harry jumps off and yells plane, he turns into a plane and flys off. next dick jumps off and yells bird he turns into a bird and flys off. finally joe steps up to the cliff as he was walking he trips and falls as hes falling he yells HARRY DICK he than hits the ground and dies. everyone mourned for such a well respected individual.

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Men, get on the boat.

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What's worse than doing the dishes with long sleeves? Finding out your girlfriend's been cheating on you.

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Barack Obama, George W. Bush and Dick Cheney are in a room, what are they doing? A: Breathing

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What did the apple say to the apple? Nothing, they're apples.

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Mrs. Welsh

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why did the man tell a joke? to make people laugh

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What did the Mexican man say to the American man? Nothing. Neither of them spoke the same language.

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My life :(

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Once upon a time There was an ugly barnacle He was so ugly That everyone died The end!

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A blonde and a brunette are out for drinks. The brunette goes home early as she has to be up the next day.

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what did the little boy say to little girl? I shit bricks.

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Stephen Hawking raped your mom

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Why did the chicken cross the road it didn't, it was hit by a bus.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he felt like it.

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What do you get when you mix a deer and a pickle? A very odd dinner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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