Biggest lie ever told... Mrs. Beiber, its a boy.

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A man walks into a bar. While he sits on a barstool, a man greets him politely, and they proceed with light conversation.

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Two rocks are in the playground. Nothing happens, because rocks are not sentient beings and are thus incapable of producing any sort of activity on their own.

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Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights

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What is the difference between a mustache, and a pile of dead babies? Mustaches disgust me.

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says"what can i get for you Sarah Jessica Parker"

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How do you stop the unstoppable You dont

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Who is a knob? ross d

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What did Pikachu tell Ash? "Pikachu."

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom is dead And your dad is too

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What did the teacher say to the student? Get in the closet

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Why is six afraid of seven? There might've been a little shooting accident a few days ago which put his mother in the ER. If anyone asks go to a bar and think in your head why you would ask something like that. Let it sink in.

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? no eye deer! -jpow

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person 1: Did you hear about the black man that went to college? Person 2: no i haven't Person 1: either have I What's ironic is that they are both black

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What is the different between a blonde and a rock? nothing.

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An Octopus walks into a bar and sees that there are multiple people with instruments. The man with the Guitar says "I bet you cant play the Guitar better than Led Zeplin?" So the Octopus plays and he is better than Led Zeplin. Then the man with the Piano says "I bet you can't play the piano better than Elton John?" So the Octopus Plays it better than Elton John. The Last man from Scotland says " i bet you can't plat the bagpipes better than me?" So... The Octopus is playing around with the Bagpipes and they say to him "Hurry Up!" and the Octopus says "Shut up, I'm trying to have sex with it but first I need to get it's pajamas off" (Bagpipes have 8 long things you blow into and they have a pattern that looks like a pajama pattern) hahaha

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A man walks into a bar. He then meets some friends and has a rather enjoyable night.

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A horse cantered into a bar.

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Why did the boy fall down the stairs Because I pushed him

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Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

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What is a panda bear? A bear with black and white fur.

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What's Pink And Fluffy? Pink Fluff.

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What do you call a seven foot Egyptian named Randy who trains leopards to uproot floral cactuses? Randy.

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What's the difference between dead babies and Christmas lights? I don't have Christmas lights hanging on my Christmas tree...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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