What did the girl say to the guy raping her? Stop.

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Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white Stop stereotyping roses, already.

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What was the pirates grade? Arrr That isn't a valid grade

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but I'm your stalker, welcome to my deserted warehouse.

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So horse walk into a bar. The barkeep says "Look horse. You cant be in Here. You're too big and you're going to hurt someone....Its just not gonna work out."

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an amosh person used an electrical appliance

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Q:What did the robot say to the boy? A:Nothing the robot malfunctioned and started choking the boy, despite the towns best efforts they could not release the death grip on the boys throat, after the robot was done choking the boy it exploded killing 99% of the population in a 5 mile radius.

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Whats gay and smells like straight girls? An envelope.

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What is the answer to the universe? I would tell you but you would get board.

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What do people in Asia do for black history month? Nothing, black history month is an American thing.

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What just hit my face? The floor

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I did your mom..... A favor..... By making you..... A sandwich...... With mustard.....

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Why did i drink 4 sodas? Because i was thirsty

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Q: Whats worse than 8 babies in one bin? A: 1 babies in 8 bins

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A man walked into a bar. It hurt.

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69. Yeah- that's my street address.

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A man walks into a bar. His friend follows him in, but the first man doesn't know he's there. They both order a beer, then a couple strong shots. The first man then notices his friend, and they exchange high-fives. The man's friend says, "Hey, how ya doin?" The first man says, "Okay, I guess, but I forgot the punchline." So the second man orders his friend the strongest drink, and the weakest. He replies, "Me too, Joe. Meeeeee, too."

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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Two men are sitting on the couch watching sports, the first man farts, the second chuckles. They continue watching their program.

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What can Harry Potter NOT see with his glasses? His parents...alive.

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What is the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Lamborghini I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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What do you call a person with no life. Dead.

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What is the square root of 69? 8.306623863

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what do you call a man with no legs? disabled.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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