Man is hit by a falling tree his friend immediately responds "Got Wood" the man is now paraplegic

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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: Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash? The pilot and three passengers died.

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There are too many 20 year olds getting pregnant. Teenage pregnancy is ruining our society!

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How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

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Geuss what? Bob is wide awake and he likes strawberries but he didn't have any strawberries so he ate a hamburger but fred wanted a hamburger but bob ate it so he just ate bob but bob was wide awake so he saw fred eating him so he called the pigs to come and eat fred because pigs eat anything but the pigs had already eaten their daily freds so they ate bob because they hadn't already eaten their daily bob but fred had already eaten bob so they got angry at fred so they just ate him anyway but then they got fat so a wolf ate them but then some hunters killed the wolf and ate it so they are actually eating a hamburger because the wolf ate the pigs and the pigs ate fred and fred ate bob and bobb ate a hambuger but he actually likes strawberries.

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What ruined the little boy's day? He drowned.

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Why can't the dinosaur eat M&M's? He is dead. He used to rule the Earth 65 Million years ago, though. Dinosaurs are reptiles. Whales are not. Meow?

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Ha

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What did the doctor say to the Jew? You have cancer.

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Whats worse than finding bubba in your house? Getting raped by a rabid racoon..

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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Why are black people good at basketball? They practice

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Jared Gough is a slut

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what do you say when you see a winner weaner

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Whats black and smells like white paint? A) Black paint!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted to be cool, But I look like you

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What do you get if you cross James Bond with Osama bin Laden? James bin Laden.

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What's worse than an avalanche? Being raped in prison.

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Black people. They are so kind.

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A: how do u wake up lady gaga? B: you poke her face

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how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

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What do you call an alligator in a vest? An amphibious mammal wearing clothes. Why would you ask me that.

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Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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