Whats worse than a flat tire? penile fracture

What happens when you lay a diamond in the water for two hours? It gets wet.

What does a human have in common with a tree?? You can cut a humans leg of and count the....oh wait

Your mama's so fat that she has type 2 diabetes.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

a man walks into a gay bar. he was gay.

What's worse than getting hit by an arrow in the knee? Being kidnapped for 10 years and finally getting free only to find out your whole family was murdered by the person who kidnapped you.

See you ******* dogface! All right? You're a compulsive *********** sit on that swivel! Stop swearing!

Why was the baby upset? Because it accidentally killed its twin brother by pushing it off the bed.

Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

Yo mama's so fat that when she was diagnosed with a flesh eating disease she was given 10 years to live.

3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks.

Yo Mommas so poor, when i went to her house and started to clear out the cob webs, she said why the heck are you tearing down the curtains.

Roses are brown, violets are brown, who keeps shitting in my garden?

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I threw a refrigerator at it

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

A man, trying to be polite, asks his irritating coworker, "Did you get a haircut?" His coworker responds, "No, I got them all cut!" The man groans and shakes his head.

What do you call 10,000 lawers jumping out of a plane? A good start.

what's the difference between ya mum and a cow? nothing. by mad james

Kid: Hey,can i have all the answers to this test please. Teacher: What the hell kid im the fricken teacher.

Potato.

What did the two eggs in the frying pan say to each other? Nothing, their eggs.

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, " I forgot to store nuts for winter and now I am dead." Its funny because the squirrel gets dead.

What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...