Yeah, you cant make nukes without certain components which are illegal to come by, you know Iranian Uranium I believe, I still feel pretty ill, if you dont mind, lets change the subject. Say, does the word yellowcake mean anything to you?

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? one.

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Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

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Q. Why did the sheep die? A. I pushed it off a bridge

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How many militant feminist does it take to change a lightbulb? 2, one to change the bulb and another to suck my dick.

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What did the 16 year old boy say to the obese girl who failed at typing? "sucks for you bitch-face."

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Your mother is so fat that her body takes up more space than the average woman.

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What does the Christian celebrate on Christmas? Christmas

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An Israeli, a Palestinian and an American walk into a bar. The Israeli shoots the Palestinian and says it was self defence. The American agrees with him.

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A man dropped his pen so he picked it up. He is satisfied that he is a sufficient worker.

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say it aloud and fast: •im sofa king stew ped •ice bank mice elf •alpha Q •mike hunt •mike ock

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A man walks in to a bar, the bartender asks "what will it be?" The man says i don't know, what will it be?"

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves the bar slightly intoxicated.

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Whats the difference between the floor and the ceiling? One of them is higher!

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Whats red, green, and goes 60 mph? A frog in a blender.

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Knock Knock Who's there? I'm from the Department of Child Services, i'm here to take your children.

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Bill: Did you hear about the black guy that went to college? John: No. Bill: me neither...

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Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Because Jimmy was a fish

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why didnt the boys drink the coffee? because she coughed on it

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Dinosaur!

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Why did the man die in his office? Because a storm five miles away took down a power line that fell onto a truck igniting the fuel in it causing an explosion that started a forest fire that burned down another power line causing a spark to fly out of the man's phone and into his ear, killing him instantly.

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Why can't Tom go horse back riding? He is paralized from the neck down

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A man walked into a bar...Ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall of the building and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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