What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

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Why couldn't Jimmy eat his food? Because I threw a microwave at him

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EVERYBODY has a penis!!! Everybody!!!!

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Your mom is such a big whore that she sleeps with your dad.

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What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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Your mother is so fat that she will likely eventually develop diabetes.

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why did scooba steeve loose his flippers? because his head imploded after reaching an extremley high pressure point at the bottom of the ocean. unable to live, his memory was a bit less persistant.

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Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

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I'm rick james bitch

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Whats the difference between a black man and a paraplegic? A paraplegic doesn't walk out on his family

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why was 14 scared of 15? 7-8-9

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How does a black guy die? Unknown

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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Actually it was me Josh brown

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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A praying mantis is very graceful

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How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

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Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

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Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

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What do you do with a wombat? Allow it to freely express instinctive behaviour in its natural habitat.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead

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Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops