what is big white and hurts when it falls on you out of tree? A refrigerator

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Q: What's worse than your parents dying in a car crash? A: You were in the backseat and saw your mother plead your father to slit her throat witht he broken glass because her legs were brushed and a windshield wiper was shoved in her kidney. As you stared on in pure horror, your father did as she asked with much contemplation. An ambulance arrives moments later. In the hospital, you tell your dad that you hate him for killing mom. You run away and he dies overnight due to heart failure. Yo suffered paralysis and now and are confined to a wheelchair for the rest of your natural life and are sent away to a born-again foster care home where you are never adopted.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, horse, we don't serve your kind here." The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse," says the bartender, "I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse, are you deaf? I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out, knocking over a stool with his tail.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue if something smells bad, its gotta be you! Roses are red this much is true but violets are purple not f***ing blue!

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roses are red violets are blue i bribed a hobo to eat my poopoo

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What do you call a Mexican that crossed the border. An Illegal Immigrant.

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whats worth than finding half a dead worm in your apple getting rapped by your step dad

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Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

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So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

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Knock knock whose there alzheimers alzheimers who get in the van

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What do you call a man with a spade stuck in his head? An ambulance, he may be in need of urgent medical assistance

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

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Santa Claus is so hairy he need to shave more often.

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What's black and sits at the top of the stair case? Stephen hawking in a house fire.......

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

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What human can fly without holding any thing (exept cloths i dont like inapropeate jokes i dont know it a very intresting quesiton

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What is the defference between Obama and an American? Obama doesn't have a birth certificate.

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How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

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What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

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What sits on a shelf and says hey im a book? A person who thinks hes a book.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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