What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? I don't cum on my watermelon before I eat it.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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Baseball

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Your Mamma is so poor that she begs for money.

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FOLLOW ME @airvvv

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A black woman and an Asian woman are both driving their cars. They arrive safely at their respective destinations.

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i feel bad for black people (even though u can't consider them people)

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Two peanuts were walking down the street and one was asalted

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What's worse then having Casey Anthony babysit your child? A girl asking, "Is it in?"

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Why did a man get arrested in a bar He was covered in bombs and charged with terrorism

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#FEARtheFLAMINGOS

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Three men walked into a metal pole

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What do you not want to get when playing scrabble? Diarrhea

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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yesterday i saw a man walking down the street with no legs. just kidding.

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Yo' mama's so fat, she has difficulty finding clothes that fit

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What's big, black, wide, long, and has white lines all over it? A new highway road.

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What do you call a black man who gets in the car with a drunk woman? An unsafe, yet easily avoidable situation.

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Your Momma’s muscle to fat ratio can only be explained in irrational complex numbers.

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knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant

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"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

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What did the rapist say when he spotted the young girl? I am going to rape you!

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When is a joke funny? When you read it.

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Two small boys are walking in a schoolyard. One of the boys sits down under a tree looking distraught. The other asks him "Well whats the matter Eddy?" "Every time I walk to my bus-stop in the morning, Jimmy Krugan, pushes me down and takes my money. " The first boy thinks for sec.. "Well here's what you do Ed; go to your Dad's shed and grab a 2X4, paint it bright blue. In the morning, walk to school with it under your jacket and when Jimmy starts in on you give him a good wallop. He wont be bothering you anymore." The following day the boys are in the yard again. Eddy is seen under the tree seeming just as distraught. Confused, the boy asks him.. "Well Ed, did you do what I told you?" "No."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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