Q. what happend to the guy who walked by an alley in new york? A. he got beat up by a robber wich took hes money, cellphone, keys and his abillity to walk.

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All the other kids with the pumped up kicks died in a school shooting.

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What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

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Whats invisible and smells lile carrots? Rabbit fart

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What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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What's hot and cold at the same time? Hotcold.

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Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

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what do u call a hairy cow? Harry

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How do you keep black people from your Kool-aid? How? You put it in a safe-deposit box.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a pop because he was a designated driver

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What did God say to the man who just died? Nothing. God and Heaven something parents make up so kids will do the right thing.

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What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

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Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

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what's white and long and hairy? -Dean when hes on his period

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Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

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Why couldn't the girl go to the bathroom? Because she was obese.

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Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops