What day is it? Asked the man with a gun who dislikes music. Friday. Mostly because yesterday was thursday and tomorrow is Saturday. Sunday comes afterwards also. The man says "oh. I thought it was Tuesday."

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NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

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Once upon a time there was a man that was exercising and he pulled a muscle and had to have his arm removed. The end.

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Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

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Whats green and has white spots? Idk im asking you

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What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

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YOU KNOW WHO ELSE LOVED AND NURTURED ME THROUGH MY CHILDHOOD YEARS? MY MOM.

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Why was the girl crying? Because I raped her

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How can you tell if your roomate is gay? If he gets an erection when you have anal sex with him.

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Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

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How do you tell a crazy man that he is on fire? You're on fire.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your pear.

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Why do zebras have stripes? I don't know.

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Before Marriage: Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait. Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will. Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: Never. Why are you even asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get. Girl: Will you hit me? Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy? Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling! After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)

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Why do the Chinese eat cats? Because it is a good source of protein that is relatively easy to obtain. Really, it's not much different than killing pigs for food.

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Why can't a T-Rex masturbate? Because dinosaurs have been extinct nearly 65 million years, due to an asteroid collision with the Earth

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What do you call a black man on the moon - A Problem What do you call 5 black men on the moon - A Bigger Problem What do you call every black person on the moon - Problem Solved!

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what do u call a Muslim flying a plane??? 9-11

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Roses are blurry so is everything else I need glasses

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One day, I was talking to a lamp on the phone, when I realized I had called the wrong lamp.

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My closet is like the wardrobe to Narnia, accept my closet isnt a portal into a magical world.

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Q. Why was the boy depressed? A. Because he lives in a world where apparently all girls are right.

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Why don't flowers bite you when you pick them? Cuz they don't have a brain.

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Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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