whats flat and useless? the walls of an abandoned house where land prices are increasing and properties are in high demand

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

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What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

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A guy walked into a restaurant. He sat down and had a lovely meal left the restaurant got in his car and went home. The End

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Japanese study of the stereotypical Italian under scientifical environment: Japanese: Test one: Hello! Italian: AHAHA HOHOO! WHOPPIE! ME IS MARIO MARIO I AM MAGIC MUSHROOM EATING PLUMBER! I AMMA GONNA JUMP ON YOU (AND gRAPE YOU!) Japanese: ACTIVATE FLAMETHROWERS GET! Italian: AHAHAHAHAHOOOOOOOOOOO! Japanese: OMG ITALIAN IS STRONG! ACTIVATE TRAP DOOR! ITALIAN: *falls down door* MAMA MIA! OH NOH! Japanese: Puh! BEWARE OF ITALIAN STEREOTYPE! Experiment two:Japanese experiment with in actual Italia: Japanese: Hello Mr Itali... Italian: Are you looking at me? Japanese: Uh well I... Italian: ARE YOU LOOKING AT MEEE? WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO LOOK ME IN THE EYES EH? Japanese: Balls? Uh my mother when she gave birth to... Italian: I SAID WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS TO TALK TO ME! ITALIANS ARE DANGEROUS!

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What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

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white or wheat? wheat please.

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Your at a racism seminar. You learn not to call black people the n word but you know they really deserve it

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Steve" "Oh hey Steve, come on in"

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Did you know, I have a black man in my family tree? He works for a lawn service.

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Why did Stephen hawking walk into A bar? He didn't. This situation is impossible considering the fact that he suffers from a horrible condition causing terrible muscular paralysis preventing him from walking.

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Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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Why did the priest go to jail? He had sexual relations with young boys.

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how do you kill a blonde with a pistol Put the clip in and shoot her

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what did the nail say to the hammer? Hit me baby one more time

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Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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Q How do you make the fire fighter sad? A Kill his dog

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van

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Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

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Q: How do you turn a purple panda into a red panda A: Feed it grey poop and because it tasted so bad it got so mad it turned red.

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yo Mama so stupid a robber stole her t.v and she ran after him yelling, YOU FORGOT THE REMOTE!

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A man walks into a bar. He asks for a beer. One of the bar tenders twlls him they are all out. He takes out his gun. He has 1 bullet and there are 3 bar tenders. He wants to kill them all. What does he do? A: Shoots 1 and pegs bricks at the other two.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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