What do you call a Jewish police officer? It depends on if you are Mel Gibson or not.

why is yo mamma fat? cause she likes doughnuts

Roses are red, Violets are red, Shrubs are red, Trees are red, Holy shit my garden's on fire!

What is the difference in a crow. There is none. Both legs are of equal length.

why did my girlfriend get pregnet? i didn's use a condom, and my semen entered her long muscular tube, also known as a vagina.

What's worse than the Holicost? Bitting into an apple and finding a worm

If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? A healthy, balanced diet consisting of all food groups, unless they are vegetarian or vegan, hence they will not consume any meats or animal products.

What did the clown say to the other clown? I was not present at this conversation, and therefore I was not able to catch what they were saying

hi iggy

what did the asian father say to his son after seeing he got a B- in math? "There's small room for improvement but overall you did a great job son."

The song Friday Rules!

Wanna hear a joke? No? Oh.. Okay.

What is the same about a bird and a turtle? They can both fly . . . except for the turtle

roses are red violets are blue you should have been aborted

What's red ad spins in circles? A baby with it's head nailed to the ground.

Q. Why did the man crash the car? A. Because the driver was a bling man with no arms, who happened to have a psychological problem affecting his brain's ability to detect movement, thus making the car crash.

When u outside and the suns out.....stand under raysean u will see a solar eclispe

What did the african american ninja say to the jewish bartender? Can I have a beer?

Knock knock. Come in.

A POW is sitting in his cell when the guard walks up to him. He says "You may choose one of these tortures, drowning or listening to Rebecca Black." The POW chose Rebecca Black, for even though he disliked her music, it was much better than getting drowned

A man walks into a bar and says "ouch". The nearby patrons ask him what is ailing him.

Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

What's the difference between a Jew and a canoe? One is a person of Jewish descent and the other is a device for traversing waterways akin to the raft.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Fuzzy Wuzzy had cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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