God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

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Why did it take the rabbit so long to enter the rabbithole? Because he was hit by a truck and lost a lot of blood.

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What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

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What's sad about a truck passing behind a duck? A: Behind the Duck were the Ducklings.

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Why was Justin Beiber Booed off the stage. Because I spelt his last name incorrectly.

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A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

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Knock Knock Who's There? Betty Betty Who Betty Sue Never heard of ya I'm here from the management. You have a present. I don't care, we don't take kindly to you city folks. But Sir, If you don't take this I will have to ask you to leave. Well what is it. It's your bill. Knock knock Who's there? Cowabunga! Cowabunga Who? Moo Moo alalalalalal woohoo i'm so high

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Today i decided to burn calories, so I grabbed my lighter from the counter and put it in my pocket and proceeded to the treadmill.

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Why are women such horrible drivers? Their hair gets in the way.

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had a good wank over anime yesterday xoxo dylan hodge

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what did one apple say to another apple nothing apples cant talk

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Why was the All-black Basketball team disqualified? Because they all died in a hotel fire.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? That depends on a variety of factors.

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What do you call the Doctor who graduated at the bottom of his class? Doctor.

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A young man walks into a bar. A complicated chain of events leads to him marrying the owner's second cousin's half-niece-in-law.

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Ruebin is Red, Curtis is too. i think i need a sweaty poo

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Did you know that if you write "Beatles" on a piece of paper, chop it up, put it in some cabbage soup, eat the soup, poop it out in a cup, and put the paper back together, it spells "Ringo <3 Arby's"?

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roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

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What did the mom say to her daughter? I love you.

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What is dark in the darkness even if you shine a torchlight on it? A blackman

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Yo mama is so hairy! Then only language she speaks is Chinese

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What page are you on The gay page.

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What has 2 wheels and looks like a bike? A bike.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops