Why are people so quiet at golf game? Because its such a boring sport.

What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

What did the mother do when she find out her daughter left for the party? Nothing. She realized her daughter was old enough to make mature descions.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

A black man and a mexican man jump off the empire state building.Who wins? Nobody,suicide is a serious thing and it is depressing to think that the minorities In America would do such a thing to themselves.

Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

What do a goat and an eagle have in common? They both can fly, except for the goat.

What happend when they were 3 guys in the air? They were skydiving

A young boy is concerned about the well- being of his father, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

What do you call a house big enough to fit all the poor people in America? A fairly large establishment without quality standards.

why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

A boy with red hair is happy.

What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

How do you get down from a horse?? You don't... You get down from a duck.

Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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