A guy walks into a bar with a sad and depressed look on his face. the bartender says why the long face. The depressed guys think "how bad of eye sight he has my face is the average diameter of about 20 cm long"

Wanna hear a joke? No.

Why was the mouse flying? Because an Owl picked it up, carried it to a tree and ate it.

some one knocked on tims door, at the same exact time, someone died in africa

Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

if you are what you eat then arent pornstars considered vaginas?

Black Poeple

What did the bullied schoolboy do when he got home from school? He cried himself to sleep.

What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

what do you call someone that ran into a wall hurt

Chuck Norris is a normal man.

Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Why did the man cross the road? He was obviously trying to get to his work, however he realized he was jaywalking in front of a cop and had to pay a fine and ended up being late to work.

Wher did suzy go after the explosion? everywhere

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Dead.

Me: Tell me I'm a fairy. You: You're a fairy. Me: Poof! You're a bag of shit!

What do you call a diving-board factory worker threatening to jump off the roof? Names.

milly, milly, milly, cat

A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

What what In the butt

A kid is Jackin off and his dad walks in and says if you keep jackin off you will loose your sight. the kid says dad im over here.

What do you get when you make a website to put jokes on? People repeating the same joke over and over again, and still managing to get good ratings.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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