What do you call a black woman getting hit in the face? Domestic Violence.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa. A minute passes.

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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Life is like a box of chocolates, It doesn't last too long for fat people.

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Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

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1+1= 69

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Why was the mouse flying? Because an Owl picked it up, carried it to a tree and ate it.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. Why did the car crash? Because the driver was a loaf of bread. Why did the boat sink? Because the pirates attacked.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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What makes the world go round? Gravity.

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what is the square root of pi? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Why is one side of a geese formation heading south always longer than the other? It has more geese

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A dead baby causes years of grief and broken families

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Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

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There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. Then he woke with a fright In the middle of the night And thought about what a strange dream he was having.

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What's red and silly? A blood clot

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theres a fat guy

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

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Why did the baby cross the street? It was stapled to the chicken

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How is Stevie Wonder like Ray Charles? They are both talented musicians

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Q: How many babies does it take th paint a barn? A: I dunno, how hard are you throwing them?

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Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops