Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

Why couldn't the black guy support his family? He was only 3 years old.

Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

What's worse than breaking your arm? Not having any arms.

here's my two cents worth! *hands you two pennies , entire life savings*

An alcoholic walks into a bar, but then realises he's ruining his family so he calls the rehab

Dog is walking through a park and is almost stepped on by a horse. Dog says, "Hey, watch where you're going!" Horse says, "Well, looky here! A talking dog!"

What does an Israeli gun sound like? Jew, jew, jew, jew, jew

What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

what smells like a rose bud? a rose, bud.

Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"

Why did the robot cross the road? Because It was bionically fused to the chicken.

Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

Mother: "George what happenend to your pet rock?" George:"I dont know." Mother:"Here! I found your pet rock. It was in the same place it was before!"

Q: What did the clam say to the postman? Moral: "Hey its me the worlds only talking clam! How you doing dude!"

I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

what's an advantage of breaking every bone in your body? nothing, you're screwed.

Q: whats worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trashcan? A: 1 dead baby in 10 trashcans

an elephant is like a guy but its nose is the di**

Why didn't the 12-year old boy eat his birthday cake? He has diabetes and would likely die from the increased spike in insulin.

A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

A recently widowed blond was on her way to an appointment with her attractive physician, when she realized that she was almost out of gas, so she stopped to refuel at a station near his office.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being black

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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