Do you know what Stevie Wonder's house looks like? No. Well, neither does he.

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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once upon a time a guy thought he wrote an original anti joke but it wasnt

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how did a white girl have a black baby? she was raped at the age of thirteen.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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I need a way to meet local babes and get ripped in 4 weeks. Shame there aren't any popularly advertised methods of doing that around here...

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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one of my best friends is blind and hasn't been able to see anything hhis entire life but he can hear a hummingbird from 50 yards away i mean, talk about worthless..

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There is no I in team... But there is a u in suck. There is no I in team, but there is in awesome

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Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

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what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

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And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

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Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

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What do you call a spider with no legs? A spider.

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whats worst than a trashcan full of dead babies? A baby eating the dead babies.

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There is my brain said the English man stop leaving it in the fridge and let me mug you now get in the car OK!

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What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU..

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Q: Who was shot 50 years ago? A: Abraham Lincoln was shot 50 years ago! (=

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So a clown walks up to you and asks, "What'll always STICK with you? The violent disposition of humanity."

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What's the difference between a pile of rotting shit about to be re-heated in the microwave and Kevin James's new movie "The Zookeeper" ... Nothing.

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How did Doris respond to Uncle Monty's innapropriate chewing of her nose, ears and eyelids? She cut his head off, placed it an a saucepan, boiled and seasoned it, and then sold it to the middle east. The middle east were very grateful, and sent Doris a camel's penis as a thankyou gift.

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"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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