Selena Gomez, Victoria Justice, and Arianna Grande walk into a bar. They were making a movie.

Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a hammer. The other is a watermelon.

What did the fly say to the spider? Please, I have a wife and daughter.

why did the chicken cross the road? because it was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want to live any more

How do you take a shit?, by taking it to go.

Under Chuck Norris' beard, there is a chin.

A black person goes up to the drive through at popeye's, what did they say? Nothing, it was closed.

What happened to the boy with no family? He died in a tragic car accident along with his family

Three Lawyers are walking, one falls down, gets up and continues walking

Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping cart? One holds groceries. The other molests small children.

I was walking down the road yesterday with only 1 shoe. A man stops by and says "Did you know that you lost a shoe?" I reply "No I didn't. I found 1."

You know its time to leave when she wake's up out of her coma and your balls are on her chin.

A man begged for forgiveness, for a sin commited Jesus forgave him, Jesus loves you

What did the baby get for his birthday? An Abortion.

What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

Why didn't they let the black people play baseball? Because they're bigoted bastards.

Click here to end the world.

What's slippery when wet? A wet slipper.

Q. What does FIAT stand for? A. Frenzied Italian At Traffic-lights.

What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

How many band geeks does it take to catch a football? One, especially if he/she is on the football team.

Why is Megan Fox so hot? Because the air conditioning broke.

Why was Helen Keller such a bad driver? Cause she was blind, def, and mute. Thus making it difficult to drive.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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