A man walks into a Library and asks for a book on suicide. The Librarian says: "Do you have a library card?" The man says no and applies for one.

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why did the man walk into the metal pole? because hes blind and suffers from cancer.

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What's green and fuzzy and has legs that would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

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Women's rights.

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Went to the corner shop - bought 4 corners.

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How do you keep your dog warm? Put antifreeze in its water dish.

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

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A duck walks into a bar and says he needs to buy a hammer. The bartender tells him that he's probably looking for the hardware store across the street. The duck realizes that he's disoriented again and should listen to his wife's many pleadings to get back on his medication.

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why did the goose lay an egg? because it was pregnant .

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Q: How many vaginas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Just one.

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Why did the black guy not have friends He was socialy awkward

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Two men are walking. The first one ask "what time is it?". They die.

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Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one at the bottom.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? ........Because he was severely scared when he witnessed a stray dog bleeding out

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shabalabadingdong JLR

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Why did Michael Jackson like 24 year olds? Because they are apart of humanity and he had no reason to dislike them.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because not only was she deaf and dumb, but she was also blind and it's not possible to drive if you are blind.

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Hitler walks into a bar and is shot on sight

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What's big and black? A black fridge.

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Dont drink and drive. You might spill some.

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Q. What do Jack the Ripper and Winnie the Pooh have in common? A. Same middle name.

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A black guy and a Mexican guy opened a restaurant. They were very successful and became the most popular restaurant in town.

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What's that smell? Your grandmother being burned alive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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